TheHolisticParent.ORG The Birth Story of Kaden Liam

                        The Birth Story of Garrett Nathaniel

As told by his mama, Samanda

40 weeks and one day pregnant, I was willing to try almost anything to go into
labor. Suffering from common end-of-pregnancy complaints, combined with
sweltering Missouri heat, I was tired of looking at the co-sleeper idling obviously
in our bedroom. Filled with birth supplies poised and ready for weeks, it mocked
me each passing day.

One week before, my midwife suggested I try to hasten labor naturally. I was
already walking, walking, and walking more. I tried eating Thai, Mexican, and
favorite Greek foods. People wanted to know if I’d done the “labor dance”-- which
is really just a polite way of inquiring if I’d had sex recently. Yes. I finally sent out
a crabby email telling people to stop inquiring. My favorite response came from
a neighbor who saw me walking the hills of Clark Avenue continually, slowly
pushing Carter in the stroller while waddling along. She said, “F-it. Stop walking
and have a Cosmo!” Tempted as I was by the red drink, instead I tried what I like
to term the “midwives cocktail”-- a mix of homeopathics, and “labor dancing”.   It
didn’t work. Still no baby, still one very crabby Mama! Should have tried the
Cosmo.

So finally, a week later, one LONG day past my due date, I again tried the
cocktail. I went to sleep thinking it didn’t work—again. I woke up a few hours
later with strong contractions. Ha, I thought, I’ve felt these plenty of times the last
few weeks. This isn’t labor, they’re sure to slow down and end after a couple
hours. I looked at the clock. 12:30 am, June 13th. They always went away with
sleep, so that’s what I did—I went back to sleep. However, I kept waking every
10 minutes or so with contractions I had to breathe through, and I found myself
needing to mentally focus on some of the words and affirmations I used in
prenatal yoga. I tried changing positions, going to the bathroom, drinking water,
contractions remained strong and consistent. I woke David at 1:49 am and told
him I thought I was in labor. We lay together for about a half hour, timing
contractions, him resting his hand softly on my back or shoulder whenever I had
one. By 2:30 I decided to call my midwife since she lives far away. We both got
out of bed, I called her, told her not to hurry, but she said she would start on her
way. David and I set to putting the final touches on the house—making the
couch up for her to sleep on, emptying the dishwasher, double making the bed,
folding the last bit of laundry. I would stop every few minutes to focus on getting
through a contraction. David said, “You better take it easy because these are
getting stronger and closer, and I don’t want to deliver the baby!” By the time she
arrived at our house around 4am, I was tired and ready to sleep once again. She
checked me, only 3cm. The bad news was that the baby had turned posterior.
She gave me some positions to try to encourage baby to turn. After about an
hour of those, I said I wanted to go to bed, and we all retreated back to bed
hoping to get some rest.

I would wake with contractions and fall asleep between them. Finally, I woke up
feeling pretty well rested at 6:30am when Carter came to our room. When I
would have a contraction Carter was curious and David explained that Mama
was working hard to have a baby.   He was fine with that, but seemed pretty
unsure of what was going on when he went downstairs and a stranger was
sleeping on our couch! We all got the day started and ate breakfast. I made
some phone calls and my friend Elena agreed to watch Carter for the morning.
My midwife checked the baby’s position to find it was now not only posterior, but
forehead presenting as well. She was concerned as “Cado” (baby’s in-utero
name) descended, it would become face presenting which she had never
delivered before. Immediately I felt panicked. A family friend’s daughter two
weeks prior delivered a face presenting baby via cesarean section for this
reason. However, my midwife was positive and suggested I call my chiropractor
(who also happens to live on my street). She came over and did some pressure
points and acupuncture. She also really helped me through contractions. Cado
didn’t move immediately into the right position, but over the next two hours of
labor, position changes, and finally my midwife’s gentle touch to baby’s head
during a contraction got Cado centered again so I could continue to dilate. After
this step, Cado became much more cooperative and turned just right so my back
labor eased.

Carter came home around lunch and he was very curious, not so much about
me or the baby, but about the bright kiddy pool that was blown up in our
bedroom. He wanted in, so he went outside to his pool and played for a bit. After
he tired of that, he joined me in the bedroom and David got out his scrapbook
and showed him pictures of me laboring with him, and his birth. My labor was
getting more intense, I sought out the water for comfort, and I became more
convinced I was actually in labor. Until now, I had expected it to stall at any time
as it had so many times with Carter. A couple hours later Carter was growing
bored so David’s mom came to get him. During that time, so much is now a
blur. I worked to bring my baby into the world during those hours. Contractions
coursed through my body, and I remember many moments of wonder, pain, joy,
intensity, and of love. I mostly stayed in the birth pool. Occasionally I would get
out and David and I would lie on the bed, him lovingly, softly resting his hands on
me, until I would retreat back to the pool.

At about four o’ clock my midwife asked when my friend Kim was going to come
over to take pictures. I told her, “When something starts happening.” She looked
at me and said, “Something is happening, I think you should call her.” At this
point I was between six and seven centimeters. My contractions were intense,
but I was handling them well and had lots of time to chit-chat and recover
between them. However, I trusted her and called Kim. She got there at 4:30, just
before I entered transition and exited into laborland. We talked between
contractions for a while, listened to music, during a contraction they would all
respectfully hush. My contractions were becoming longer, harder, but I still had
breaks between them when my mind would think, “This is all stopping now, I’m
not really in labor.” I would tell my body to open up, bring the baby down, and tell
my uterus to “Bring it on” as dear Birthing from Within instructor Nancy
Elfenbaum would say! Then another contraction would hit and I would think, “Oh
yes, I am in labor and this SUCKS!” My water broke at some point and things
intensified.

During those contractions I would think of my baby, I would think of all the other
women in the world laboring at the same time as me—feeling especially grateful
that I was giving birth surrounded by such love and with the amazing calm of the
birth pool. I thought of my Yi-ya (Greek grandmother) who labored just as I was,
but in a different place and time. Throughout my pregnancy I felt bonded to other
women around the world, but in those moments of hard labor, I felt intensely
connected to them. Of course, all my moments of labor were not so filled with
love and epiphany. I did tell them that I was done and I wanted to go to the
hospital, I looked David straight in the eyes at one point and told him, “I will
NEVER have sex with you again!” and I would tell my midwife I couldn’t do it
much longer, I needed it to end. All of these requests were answered softly with
love and encouragement, and I kept thinking, “Why are you being so nice to me, I
don’t like any of you right now!” Some time during this process David’s mom
brought Carter back, but I decided I didn’t want him to see me in such hard
labor. Kim packed him a bag and sent him with David’s mom.

That was transition and soon I was complete and beginning to push. My midwife
was amazing. I kept apologizing because it was taking so long, she kept
assuring me that this is how my body does it, and its right for me. I had a
cervical lip and pushing Cado past that was the hardest part. Once I got past
that, it felt good to push. My midwife told me to let her know when I felt the ring of
fire. With my first I had a gentle birth without much pain, I didn’t get a pushing
reflex, and never did get any of the sensations I had read about or seen others
experience. However, I soon found myself yelling, “Ring of fire, ring of fire, ring of
FIRE”. She guided me to gently birth his head to which my friend Kim exclaimed
loudly, “Oh your baby’s beautiful, it has so much hair and is so big”. Another
contraction and he tumbled out of my body and into the water at 8:41pm. I
grabbed him to bring him up and my midwife had me pause while she removed
the cord around his neck. As I brought him up my hand traced his slippery back
and based on what I could feel I exclaimed loudly, “It’s a Boy!” Our eyes met. No
more pain, only intense joy and sweetness. Sweet sounds of greetings radiated
through the room. David called his mom, she and Carter were only half way to
her house, so they turned around for him to meet his new brother.

We moved onto the bed and he began to nurse. He was so alert, and round and
chunky. I had to move to the bathroom to deliver the placenta. A big baby for me
but no tear at all. After, David held us in his arms and Carter rushed in to meet
his new brother. Those moments on the bed together appreciating our new little
person are indescribable. My parents joined us. My mother commented, “You
are so brave” and I replied that I wasn’t brave, Yi-ya was the one so brave, to give
birth to so many children without all the comforts we have now. The midwife
checked him out gently, measuring him (22 inches) and weighing (a whopping 8
pounds, 11 ounces). David dressed him, my midwife put the little cap she
knitted on his head, and my mother bundled him in a blanket and he was
nestled against me once again. Never once in this process did he cry, just
looked around in wonder! We sat on the bed and chatted, David feeding me
Chinese food as our baby nursed himself into slumber. The little co-sleeper
beside our bed now empty of birth supplies and ready for Garrett
Nathaniel.

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